"Ho"lloween

When did Halloween become the day of the year that females of ALL ages transform themselves into total sluts? When did nurses and policewomen become "naughty?" And when did '80s pop star turn from lace gloves with rubber bracelets and wide belts into booty shorts and teeny tank tops? I think it says it all that I recently couldn't tell the difference between a Halloween costume store window display and a XXX shop.

No, seriously, I don't even know what these chicks are dressed as these days. As Brad and I walked around on Halloween night, we spotted teenagers exposing more skin than a Maxim magazine cover, and some adult women who just looked slutty. Of course, then the reasonable question becomes whether or not that person is in costume or just skanky. It really can go either way.

Little girls have always enjoyed dressing up like they're older than they are. But when did little girls pretending to be women become little girls pretending to be women who are dressed like little girls? Case in point: Rainbow Brite adult costume. I'm not sure how many people can identify this as Rainbow Brite - but we can all identify this as "ho"riffic.

Look, I love a costume that makes me look more pretty than scary. But the old stand-by "racy" costumes of playboy bunny and french maid are now just downright prudent. For God's sake, I shudder to think what today's version of the genie costume looks like. But I'm sure she's wearing daisy dukes (and by the way, this girl's parents must be really proud).

Meanwhile, we live in a society obsessed with "family values." Here's a family value for you: don't let your daughter leave the house looking like she just slid off the pole under the auspice of it being Halloween.

Until next year...Tricks and Treats.